With every new phase of life you learn something new, you gain the expertise through experience.But what happens when we have to share the experience, all of a sudden comparison comes into picture.I am talking about motherhood when you become mother there are many things you might have heard and one of the most common being “my baby never did that”.
Well I am not generalizing but people instead of making it easier for the new mother somewhere become the reason for her worries and instead of finding comfort the new mother ends up feeling there is something wrong with the baby or with her.
There are few things no one tells the new mother but I believe she should know
1.It is completely normal for a baby to cry, there is no concept of he/she cries a lot or little.Turn a deaf ears to people who tell you your baby cries a lot or why is your baby so silent we don’t get to hear his cries.
2.The newborn skin is sensitive and changes after few days , all the while in your tummy it was floating once they come out their skin takes time to normalise.There might be few spots here and there in their body which will fade away on its own.Till the time it fades away or even stays there as a beauty spot, just ignore people telling anecdotes about such marks.
4.Babies lose weight within 1 week after birth and that weight is regained by your love (breast milk or formula).
5.You are going to crib that your baby doesn’t sleep for longer duration and the moment he sleeps for a longer duration, you will check him almost every 15 mins if he is breathing, every mother does that.
6.It is completely normal to be over protective for your baby, that is a normal instinct that even animals have.
7.You should do your best to soothe your baby even if he/she finds your lap to be most comfortable so let it be.My baby didn’t sleep on the bed for almost 20 days after birth ,it was only my lap.There were people who suggested that he will form this as habit and will trouble me for long. But honestly at that moment all I wanted was to comfort my baby.After 20 days with tricks and duping he started sleeping on bed.
6.When your baby cries and you have no clue why is he crying .Don’t feel ashamed when people come and ask what happened why is he crying and you have to show a sorry face.Babies know only one emotion that is crying. And it is very motherly not to know what is that for.
8.Your bump will stay for a while after delivery, it takes time for the uterus to shrink back to its normal shape.
9.If you are unable to breastfeed ;that doesn’t make you less of a mother.
10.If you are breastfeeding don’t bother when people ask if you are producing enough milk.You will get to know, if that is the case because you stay with the baby 24*7 .
11.Babies should be exclusively breastfed till 6 months, if they are not breastfed then should be fed on formula, even water is not required as formula and breast milk has enough water content.
12.There is no concept of smaller breast produces less milk and bigger more.Milk production is completely hormonal and depends on the baby’s requirement.
13.Every Baby has a different speed of attaining milestones.It is perfectly alright for few to attain late and for others early.
14.After delivery there is heavy bleeding but No sanitary pads days are yet not over, once the bleeding stops you are again free from periods till the time your baby is breastfeeding.It depends on person to person but till the time your baby is exclusively breastfed there is very less chances of occurrence of menstrual cycle.This is the nature’s own way to maintain gap between kids and that is amazing.
15.Try to get back to shape for a healthier lifestyle not because everyone around you is losing and getting back to pre pregnancy shape.
Lastly there is always a first time and it is one of the most wonderful feeling on this earth.First time is special don’t ruin it because people around say something which they think is right for your kid.make your experience special with lots of memories with both lows and highs in it and please please once you pass through the phase don’t be like the people I have discussed above.Next time you see a mother in distress just assure her and let her know how wonderful she is.