Once you become a parent there is always a battle within; the battle of wrong and right.You always want the right thing for your kid and make constant efforts for it, that is a responsible parenting but have you ever wondered that in your effort of putting across everything right to your kid are you somewhere curbing his right to know the world on his own, is our responsible parenting turning into a helicopter parenting.
I remember the days when my mother would leave me with other kids to play with strict instructions not to go far away and on the other hand some of my friends were only allowed to play in their porch although we lived in a campus but still they were not allowed to go out of their own porch.I was 8-9 year old then and I use to wonder why is aunty not leaving them to play away from home.Those aunties would take all the details in case their kids were left at my place to play; like what all you played, what did you eat? My mother never asked such things in detail she was ok with the fact that I ate, she would never go into details and would never even stop me if I wish to tell her the details.I never shared the policy of don’t tell my mom we did this with my friends but was always the one who was told not to share the details with their parents.
While we grew up although I was not a very good student but still my mother never pestered the teachers with questions of my grades or never sat with me to make me study.It is not that I never had my share of pestering parents I had, they would bother me when I would be watching TV or playing for hours together but my parents will never sit by my side and make me study once I was old enough to study on my own.And honestly I am doing way better than my counter parts not bragging but just quoting a fact.
When we had our boards my parents would wish me all the luck and would ask me to attempt the paper slowly and calmly.There use to be a very low attendance in the bus but the moment I would reach the venue the huge rush of parents with their kids would give the feel of examination back into my mind.Many of my friends in their late teens were accompanied by their parents.I use to find it amusing to see some parents holding the books for their kids while others would make them eat.The only feeling I had at that point was how will these people cope when they will leave their home for higher studies and are they seriously going to turn into adults in a year or two and would even vote yes I thought about voting because dating was evidently out of question for them.
While I was planning to take a sabbatical many people asked me not to take such a long break as in teens kids need more parental guidance read control than now.Many of the female colleagues would take leave when their kids have boards or some final exam.I am no where making a point or tagging them but you can never force a kid to study by constantly being around, they will just simply shut their minds.I can bet on it that a kid who has not been pestered to study will get better grades than a kid who is constantly reminded to study.
The point I am trying to make here is that there is a very thin line between a concerned parents and helicopter parents and by giving an over dependent upbringing we will only spoil our kids either they would start lieing to us or they would become over dependent with no decision-making ability of their own.
As a parent we are supposed to raise our kids not raise sheep who has been asked to graze the field and they do because they have their master hovering around.